Posted by admin in Politics on 24. Jan, 2012 | 0 Comments
Scott Ricketts | The Tattler TAMPA, Florida. — In what has already been a bitter and bizarre Republican presidential campaign, perhaps the strangest moment yet occurred in Tampa, FL at the latest Republican debate when Mitt Romney gave birth to a corporation while on stage. Debate moderator Brian Williams of “NBC Nightly News” had just [...]
Will Meinen | The Tattler OMAHA, Neb. — Mark Harmon, claims adjuster for State Farm Insurance, recently segued from a discussion about Martin Luther King, Jr. Day holiday activities and remembrances, into a description of one of his own dreams. Mr. Harmon and several colleagues were eating lunch at a Lone Star Steakhouse near their [...]
Will Meinen | The Tattler CHARLESTON, S.C. – Republican presidential candidate Newt Gringrich offered assurances to social conservatives when, during the South Carolina primary debates, he declared that he never asked his second wife for an open marriage. “Let me be clear,” said the irritated Gingrich, “I never asked my second wife, Marianne, for an [...]
ACT 1, Scene 1 Capitol Hill. Evening. PIPA, sitting on a marble step, is trying to take off his boot. He pulls at it with both hands, panting. PIPA: Nothing to be done. SOPA: Seems that way. I’ve been coming around to that idea my whole life. Hard to change things in this world. PIPA: Your whole [...]
Will Meinen | The Tattler OMAHA, Neb. — The post went up on her Facebook wall at 8:26 AM Monday morning. The message suggested that the sender had been slighted, over-reacted to a passing comment, or desperately needed to be acknowledged by an online community with varying knowledge of the sender’s life circumstances. Stacey Pender some [...]
Posted by admin in Sports on 31. Jan, 2012 | No Comments
Jacob Hainline | The Tattler HOMESTEAD, Fla. — Bankrupt and newly-homeless, NASCAR’s Derrike Cope, driver of the No. 73 FlipNBags Dodge Charger, has taken up residence in the very same No. 73 FlipNBags Dodge Charger, according to sources. Cope, who finished at the bottom of the 2011 Sprint Cup standings, currently lacks a fixed address [...]
Posted by admin in Politics on 26. Jan, 2012 | No Comments
Will Meinen | The Tattler OKLAHOMA CITY, OK. – The U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals struck down the Oklahoma legislature’s controversial constitutional amendment banning courts from using Sharia Law. The appellate judges ruled that the measure, called State Question 755, violated the Federal Constitution’s provision stating, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of [...]
Posted by admin in Sports on 09. Jan, 2012 | No Comments
Jacob Hainline | The Tattler WASHINGTON, DC. — The Auburn Tigers, or possibly Michigan St., claimed victory in a random college football bowl game against some other team, according to the hazy recollection of the U.S. populace. The exact final score could not be pinned down, as the nation was flipping back and forth between [...]
Posted by admin in News, Sports on 06. Jan, 2012 | No Comments
The Tattler | Jacob Hainline DENVER, Col. — Following an embarrassing 41-23 loss to the New England Patriots, Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow renounced his Christian faith and proclaimed himself an atheist. Tebow, who until now had been the NFL’s most high-profile evangelical Christian, told reporters during Sunday’s post-game press conference that Denver’s humbling 18-point [...]
Posted by admin in Entertainment on 21. Nov, 2011 | No Comments
Will Meinen | The Tattler OMAHA, Neb. — From the auteurs that brought you “Public Golf Course Misunderstandings” and “Executive Steering Committee for Diversity — Hurt Feelings,” The Tattler introduces “Best of Parliamentary Kerfuffles: International.” Following the wild success of the VHS series featuring thrilling, yet civil disagreements in the British House of Lords, The [...]
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